Made to Order

Jan. 8 - Hale's Moon, Wastelands

"Have you come to deliver further instructions?" it asked.

It was an abomination. The eyes an unholy red. The Dharma jumpsuit was in tatters revealing a metal exoskeleton underneath. The decaying grey skin of its face was a parody of Sheriff Gallagher Aeon.

I had returned to the wastelands of Hale's Moon to continue my search for Lily. Exploring the area outside of the smaller settlement, I was surveying the hills when this monstrosity approached me.

I did not recognize the unit, but it looked foreboding.

Nevertheless, I am never one to miss an opportunity, so I asked, "Do you have a report to make?"

"The other still lives," said the replicant, "My mission is not yet complete."

I nodded. Other. Possibly Gallagher himself. 'Still lives'. Sounds like we have a hunter killer here.

"I await information as to his whereabouts," it continued.

"What of the deputy? LilyBell," I asked.

"The other," it continued, "There can be only one. The other must be eliminated."

Okay, nothing there.

"Do you have any clue as to his whereabouts?"

"I was told to ask Ralph," it replied.

I nodded. It could be a reference to the planet Ralph, but I was not about to tell this killing machine.

"I have yet to locate the human," it added.

"Do you have anything else to report?" I inquired.

"No. Not yet."

I probed. "Where are you stationing yourself?"

"That information is highly classified."

"Of course," I said. It's always classified. "Have you made contact with the other at all?"

"The most recent information I have is from early December. He is in a coma."

I nodded trying not to show any sort of reaction. "How long have you been deployed then?"

"Three and 1/2 months."

"And did you conceal your insertion vehicle well?" I asked.

"It is buried in the desert."

"Show me," I said.

"Its location is classified."

What was I going to do with this thing?

"For security reasons, give me your full designation," I insisted.

"Classified."

"How can I deliver further instructions unless I am sure you have not been compromised?" I asked.

"I am unhackable," declared the replicant, "My mission is stored within the cloned human tissue in my positronic brain."

Okay, that was useful.

I took a shot in the dark.

"Oh?" I asked, "Are you that Blue Sun prototype I keep hearing about?"

"My production model is classified," it reported.

"I'm not asking for a model number..."

"All aspects are classified," it answered.

"Classified to what level?" I asked.

"If you were affiliated with this mission you would already have all this information," it replied.

Fine. Time to take a different approach.

"I am looking for the genetic construct," I said.

"Which one?," asked the machine. "There are alot these days."

"LilyBell Snoodle," I replied.

"Mindo's creation," it answered.

"That's classified," I answered with a smile.

"I have detailed information on LilyBell Snoodle," began the machine. "Her off button is on her left ankle...."

"Go on," I prompted.

The Gallagher drone noticed a sound and stopped speaking. A vehicle suddenly appeared from over the hills.

It was a mule driven by a replicant that I did not know. Her passenger, however, was someone I was acquainted with. It was Krenshar Magic.

The Gallagher drone spoke to be overheard, "...so the bishop said, never on a Tuesday."

Krenshar climbed out of the vehicle and rubbed his chin.

"Hello," said the Gallagher drone.

"Hello Mr. Krenshar," I said. I had wanted to meet with him but not like this.

"Hello," greeted the replicant pilot.

"What do we have going on here?" asked Krenshar.

"This officer is sharing information about human humor," answered the Gallagher drone. "Bahzinga."

"Okay," said Krenshar but he looked at me.

There I was on the wastelands of Hale's Moon surrounded by armed replicants, one of whom I had arrested, and all of whom the military I represented had made homeless. I had no choice but to use the most powerful weapon at my disposal.

I told the truth.

"Well, it appears to be a hunter killer of some kind. I can't deduce it's origin but it appears to be after the sheriff."

"There can be only one," intoned the drone.

"Yes," said Krenshar, "He is from the old wars. He has been here a while. You're not trying to influence him are you?"

The pilot interrupted, "Incoming Dark on radar."

"Mr. Krenshar," I asked, "is he a danger to Gallagher?"

The Gallagher drone answered Krenshar, "My mission is classified. She is not on the list."

A figure joined us. The pilot greeted him as 'Dark'.

"A danger to Gallagher, hmm," mused Krenshar.

"When he returns I will crush him," pronounced the Gallagher drone.

"I guess everyone is a danger if you think about it," answered Krenshar.

The pilot addressed Krenshar, "I think Gallagher needs new program. His one he has is too old."

I nodded towards the drone, "Well, 'crushing him' sounds bad."

The pilot thought I was suggesting the crushing the drone. "Naa, he is cool. No need him crash. Just fix."

"Well, everyone has a mission," answered Krenshar.

Krenshar grinned. "You both have a nice day." He added and he jumped back up into the mule.

"Mr. Krenshar..." I called out.

"Have a good time," the pilot called back as she followed him.

"I will make his head explode," declared the drone, "with knowledge......and C4."

I sighed.

"Jump Dark," coaxed the pilot.

Dark also climbed aboard the craft.

"Wanna guys take a ride?" the pilot asked.

To my surprise, the Gallagher drone hopped into the back of the mule. It laughed in a way that sounded unnatural to my ears .

"I training driving," boasted the pilot with a wide smile.

I called out again, "Mr. Krenshar... tell Lily that there is danger in the program she carries."

Krenshar said nothing.

The Gallagher drone, however, answered, "There is danger in every program she carries."

"Human going with us?" asked the replicant pilot. She turned to me, "Are you come with us?

Right. Like I'm going to 'go for a ride' with the Replicant Order after what we did to Caliban. I may be fearless, but I'm not stupid.

"I will return to my ship," I replied.

"Okay, have then a good safe travel," said the pilot.

I nodded. "Thank you."

The mule lifted up into the air and turned towards the main settlement and the Destiny refugee camp lying beyond.

"Keep tight guys," called the pilot, "Now I again will break walls!" And with that they sped away leaving me in the hills of Hale's Moon.